When To Walk Away After Infidelity: Forgiveness or Divorce?
Dealing with the betrayal of your beloved one is one of the hardest and most painful things in life. Especially when you’ve been married for years, have kids and property together, and were going to spend your lives together. How to understand whether your marriage can be restored? When to walk away after infidelity? What are the signs to call it quits? See the answers to these questions below.
You hear no words of asking for forgiveness
The marriage after infidelity is possible to be saved in case the unfaithful partner understands what they did wrong and is eager to work it out. But what if they don’t even see the point in asking to forgive them and just want to leave the situation as it is? In such a case, you can demand a genuine talk with your spouse to see their point of view. However, we wouldn’t encourage you to have high hopes for rebuilding your marriage: if the other partner doesn’t care and doesn’t recognize that they’re the one to blame for infidelity, you’ll hardly restore such a marriage. In such scenarios, it is best to get a divorce rather than living in an unhappy married life. So, you should get in touch with an attorney to learn how to make divorce painless. For more information, you can visit this Link.
Family therapy isn’t on their to-do list
When a certain problem in marital life arises, it’s completely okay to turn to psychologists or counselors for help. Having a professional looking into your situation is reasonable if you can’t resolve the issue on your own but want to get it done. On the contrary, the partner who doesn’t want to ask for professional advice when things get worse (and infidelity is one of such cases), it’s time to consider getting divorced. If your partner agrees to a divorce, opt for a cheap uncontested divorce in Florida with a prior division of all property and money you have to avoid litigation.
Your partner isn’t ready to put effort into rebuilding your bond
If you happen to be walking in on cheating spouse, you can still bring the shade of a happy life back if you see them trying to improve your relationship. Does your partner come up with ideas to spend time together or demonstrate to you that you’re still important to them in any way? If your answer is positive, over time, you may be lucky to forget and forgive their betrayal. But what if they cheated on you and kept neglecting your company after that? Such behavior shows that marriage isn’t important to them at all, so why would you try to restore it?
You know that your partner stays in touch with their lover
Another sign of the coming divorce is the fact that your spouse keeps seeing the person they cheated on you with. Since you can’t be sure about what’s going on in the soul of another person, you may not know whether any deep feelings are involved there. Maybe, they’ve known each other for years, maybe, they met a few weeks ago and appeared to have a strong lust for each other. Anyway, the fact your unfaithful partner keeps contacting their lover confirms that the previous relationship doesn’t matter to them. To not torture yourself and save the leftovers of your self-respect, consider leaving such a partner and getting divorced from them.
All you hear is lies
Recollect your talks for the last months and remember how many truths and lies you happened to hear over this time. Even if your partner betrayed you but managed to admit it and took some steps to resolve this issue, they may be worth fighting for. After all, the individual who is honest and open with you has the potential for a certain compromise and there are small chances to rebuild your bond. But the person who lies and abuses you is the one you should run away from without a trace of pity. The marriage where you’re not respected and taken for granted isn’t the one you should tangle yourself to.
Your partner puts the blame for their cheating on you
Before getting a divorce or reconciling with your spouse it’s crucial to find out what your partner actually thinks about the reasons for their infidelity. What triggered it and do they understand their full responsibility for it? Keep in mind that cheating is always a choice, not an accident: a mature person who is committed to their partner wouldn’t happen to hook up with another man or woman by chance. Thus, the cheater is the one to blame for what they did, not their partner who is a victim of lies and betrayal.
Your reason to stay is kids only
Ask yourself and be ready to answer honestly: “Why am I willing to save this marriage? Do I really love my husband/wife or is it just kids and the habit of living together that holds me onto them?” In case you do care about your children but are at the same time sick and tired of your partner, don’t stay married. Living together for the kids wouldn’t bring any good if you secretly or openly hate each other. Such marriages cause more damage to the mental health of kids rather than doing them any good in the long run.
You’re not having sex anymore
The last but not least sign you’d rather break up with your spouse than try to restore your marriage is the absence of any sexual bond between you. Sex is an important part of marital life, and if you lack it, you miss a good way of staying close to each other, understanding the needs and wishes of another person, and having the overall satisfaction of being in the relationship. There’s no surprise you don’t want to sexually engage with the one who cheated on you, so be ready to face the divorce in the future and start your personal life all over again with someone better.