How to Help Your Kid Fight Fears
A child experiences a spectrum of emotions from the moment he is born. Their developmental process begins with the simplest emotions, such as sadness, and progresses to the more complex ones of joy, sadness, and fear. But why do childhood fears arise and what can be done to help your child overcome them?
Why We Need Fear
Fears are necessary and important because they protect us from trauma. After all, they are one type of emotional response that serves a protective function in a specific situation.
Children are usually afraid of many things – the dark, animals, loneliness. If parents and surrounding family members react correctly to the child’s emotions and help him or her to live through the frightening experience, then children’s fears, especially the early ones, go away on their own.
If a child reacts emotionally to familiar and quite safe situations or things for a long time, this can indicate serious internal or external problems – developmental disorders, conflicts in the family, inadequate parental behavior.
Often, fear can be provoked by insignificant and ordinary situations. Even a walk in the park when the baby is barked at by a dog risks becoming a powerful experience with which the child’s fragile psyche cannot cope. Fear regulates a child’s reactions and, consequently, behavior.
Without the support of an adult, repeated traumatic situations can lead to uncertainty, anxiety, withdrawal, as well as physiological abnormalities such as stuttering and bedwetting.
What Causes Childhood Fears
An Incident or Situation That Occurred in Reality
This can be a loud sound, a painful experience at the doctor, a fall from a bicycle, a dog bite or an unexpected escape underwater while swimming in the river. Emotions in these situations are completely justified. To calm down and not to fix this fear, the child needs the support of a loved one. If this situation has occurred, it’s unnecessary to scold the child or in any other way exacerbate the heated emotions.
Reaction of a Significant Other
Parents who suffer from phobias can pass them on to their children. If a child has repeatedly watched their mother become anxious and nervous when they ride the Ferris wheel or go up a mountain, they may copy this behavior. The only way out is for adults to keep their reactions under control.
Parental Intimidation
Often adults intentionally fixate on a child’s anxious reactions in dangerous situations. Let’s say a child is playing on the playground and climbs to the very top. He has not yet fallen and is not even close to the potential danger, but the grandmother is already shouting: “Get down quickly, you’re about to fall and break your head!” In such cases, adults should try to choose softer language and fight their anxiety.
A Child’s Rich Imagination
A vivid and fertile imagination can quickly lead a child into the thicket of fear. It is important for parents in such cases to be near the child, to remind him or her that they will protect him or her in any situation, to talk and listen to him or her.
Family Conflicts
The child is not yet able to distinguish and understand the causes of quarrels that occur in the family. He often subconsciously considers himself to be the culprit of arguments between mom and dad. Anxiety translates into childhood fears. The child may begin to dread the evening when Dad comes home from work because that is when they begin to argue with Mom. Any association with conflict can cause a flood of negative emotions.
Neuroses and Borderline Mental Conditions
The child may experience fear of an innocuous toy, clothing, dishes or food. May react negatively if the usual route to kindergarten is changed, or may be panicked about familiar household procedures – brushing teeth, brushing hair or washing. It’s possible that the baby’s emotion is connected with a traumatic event to which he can’t react in any other way, or to explain what happened in the first place.
Helpful Hints
Although fears are hidden inside your kid, you help your child cope with such troubles, using tools as simple as eSports betting.
Let your kid know that you are there for him and that you are ready to help. Talk frankly and assure them that you understand their fears.
Don’t rush your child through this struggle. For example, one of the first steps to help your child cope with aquaphobia is to watch people swimming. You can do this by going to the pool and spending a few hours there. If, after this time, the baby feels comfortable and shows no signs of fear, the next step is to offer him or her to move closer to the edge of the pool. And after a few days, try to dip his feet into the water. Showing patience and respect for the child’s emotions, you will strengthen his confidence in his abilities.
Use art therapy techniques. If your child is frightened by a monster that lives in a dark room, suggest that he/she draw his/her fear on a piece of paper. Then you can symbolically tear the piece of paper – thereby helping the child defeat the monster. Or draw a smile on the monster and color it in bright colors – so it will stop being scary and horrible.
Role-playing also reduces anxiety. For example, to help a child overcome fear of doctors, you can play doctor and practice what he will do during the reception.
Hide-and-seek games help with fear of loneliness or the dark. In the process of playing, the child is left alone and, as a rule, forgets about the fear, getting used to this sensation at the same time.
