How to Feel Like ‘You’ Again After Having Children


Any mom is bound to agree: after having children, you can sometimes lose a small part of yourself. Yes, what you gain is infinitely more important, but it doesn’t mean you should give up on that pre-children part of you. Maybe it’s something small, like not going out as much in the evenings. Or maybe your self-confidence has taken a turn for the worse, after putting your body through so much change.


Well, here’s a few ways you can help get that feeling back.


Make time for yourself


Your children demand a huge amount of your time. From the moment you wake, until the moment your head hits the pillow at night, all you think about is them. All you do is look after them. And while you wouldn’t have it any other way, it’s important to make time for yourself too. So, organise at least one evening or afternoon a week to do something for you. Rope in a babysitter, and either go out alone or catch up with friends. Did you have a hobby before you had children? If so, try to get back into it. Or, if time is too tight, just run yourself a hot bubble bath, and relax with a book and a box of chocolates.

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Struggle to make time for yourself? Then you’ll find this article a great help. It’s full of ways to maximise your day so you give yourself some precious me-time.


Get glamorous again


You spend your days wearing whatever clothes have the least amount of sick/food/whatever your child wiped on you. You probably haven’t seen the end of a mascara wand in a while, and it’s likely that you can’t remember what your legs look like in a dress and heels. So, it’s time to change that. Book dinner at a posh restaurant, give the kids to a babysitter or your family, and go out for a luxurious evening. You’ll be surprised how much better you feel for getting dressed up and being your old self, rather than your mum-self for a while. We wrote an article recently about top makeup tips – you can read it here.

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If your body worries go further than this, you might want to have a long think about how you can get rid of them. It might be a case of getting an easy maintenance haircut, or having a mani-pedi once a month. You might want to get involved with a personal trainer or join fitness classes. Or, you might consider plastic surgery, and options like breast implants – if you’re finished breast feeding that is.


Reinvigorate the romance


Since the children came along, yours and your partner’s lives have changed unrecognisably. But underneath all the stained clothes, you’re still the same people who fell in love and started this adventure together. Sometimes, you just need to remind yourself of this. Pick a night, maybe two times a month, and have a no-kids evening. Go out for a lovely dinner, go for a walk, watch a band – whatever you did pre-children, do it again. Here’s 100 great date night ideas, so you’ll never get stuck in the ‘what do you want to do’ cycle!

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